why men cannot be left to their own device

Here’s a short story why you should never give men free creative reins to anything without supervision and that they most likely perform better under pressure, eg, at woman’s constant nagging.

Bb and I have this supposedly romantic idea when we were picking our wedding bands. Each of us have to think of something to engrave onto the ring and neither of us will see the message until our wedding day. I thought long and hard and agonized over a few good choices, but soon it became clear. My message for him on his ring would be:


I picked this for obvious reasons. Both of us love The Beatles and I just love the lyrics to John Lennon’s song:

Grow old along with me
The best is yet to be
When our time has come
We will be as one
God bless our love
God bless our love

Grow old along with me
Two branches of one tree
Face the setting sun
When the day is done
God bless our love
God bless our love

Spending our lives together
Man and wife together
World without end
World without end

Grow old along with me
Whatever fate decrees
We will see it through
For our love is true
God bless our love
God bless our love

Especially the second paragraph. The numerous ways I see it, that line carries a significant meaning. I wondered for the next 6 months or so what his message to me would be.

This is what I get:





Well, if it was the literal translation to “Just the two of us”, I would much prefer the latter. If it stood for the initials for both our names and appeared in the form of “Salt&Pepper”, I would think it cute. If it was something generic, like “S Loves P”, I’d close one eye, accept it and proudly show it off. But that was it. S&P. And given man’s capability to spun an excuse in a blink of an eye and in this case, the disability to spare more thought to romantic gesture like this, S&P is supposed to mean all that and more.

Did I mention how long it took for Mr Creative to come out with that? At least 3-4 months – the time it took for us to choose and purchase the ring, for the order to reach Paris, for the jeweler to customize a completely new one in rose gold and for the completed order to reach Singapore and came to him in the form of a phone call, requesting him to send a copy of his desired engraving before they ship it to Singapore.

If only I had not insisted on this “No peeping” policy and threatened to paint his nails on the spot, I would had gotten a more satisfactory (permanent) engraving on my wedding band. One good example goes like this.

On our wedding day, to please my mum, we went through the customary tradition of gatecrashing, where the groom will go through all sort of hardship and trials given by the ‘sisters’ on the bride’s side in order to prove to the bride’s parents and the whole village that he is worthy and will take good care of his wife. Nowadays, it’s just a series of fun games for the bride’s side to torture the guys.

One of the 3 tasks that were given was that, bb had to write a message to me, on his nails (and his Best Man’s) with a violet-pink nail polish. A ‘sister’ will then take a picture of the finished ‘manicure’ and send it to a phone inside the room for me to approve his entering. I was told, within seconds, he thought of something and a way to shorten the message so that the nail-coloring will be cut to the minimal. On each nail was a character, and it read:

2 āˆž N Byond

This was something I wrote for him in one of the earlier cards I gave him, in it I expressed my hope for our relationship to go “To Infinity & Beyond”.

Even Buzz Lightyear’s catchphrase would had been nice, in comparison to too-boring-to-be-mentioned-again.

What’s worse, I’m stuck with it till Eternity.


9 thoughts on “why men cannot be left to their own device

  1. Your Bb is an educated man. He is obviously a minimalist. The elegance of ambiguity will blossom over time … you will find more and more beautiful substitutions for the initials over time. Then you will truly appreciate his foresight and wisdom.

    To him, less is more. So he definitely loves you very much

  2. Pingback: wedding day pictures – the gatecrash «

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